Before I go any further in talking about this trip, I have to stop and remind myself and all of you that – Hey, we ARE home! From start to finish, Caleb’s adoption took less than 10 months, similar to a slightly “overdue” pregnancy. J So, while the obstacles seemed big and numerous, we are home, healthy and happy. It’s easy to focus on the negatives, but that’s not what I want this blog to be about. I want to tell about our journey, but I want you also to see the need to in the D.R. Congo - how it and many other countries differ from ours. Mostly, I want you to see how worth it is to overcome the bumps of International adoption to bring a child home.
Ok, now that that is off my chest.....Fast forward from my last post to the week of Nov. 15th
Caleb’s birthmother left St. Anne’s after staying there for over a week. This was an answer to prayer. While it was ok having her with us, I think it was confusing for Caleb. It also stressed me out because even though I have mothered other babies, I felt like I had to be “perfect”. It was a lot of pressure (mostly self-induced, but still….).
A couple days after she left, Caleb developed a fever. Having four other children, I am NOT quick to run to the doctor, ESPECIALLY in the Congo. I kept thinking it was teeth, a virus, etc. Also, I was so emotionally spent, exhausted, etc., it was hard to make a decisions. I was dreading the medical care Congo had to offer.
After a couple of days, Vickie (THANK YOU, Vickie, by the wayJ) basically insisted I take Caleb to the doctor. I told Fr. Theo that he had a temp for a couple of days and within minutes, he had arranged a driver and called an English-speaking doctor at a local medical center. The driver was a huge help. He lead me from small building to small building, small room to small room, as we paid our bill FIRST in one building, went to another to be examined, another for lab work, etc. After the lab work, we were given a piece of cardboard with a number that they had written on the slide and told to come back in a couple of hours. We weren’t back at St. Anne’s long, when the driver knocked on our door and told me we needed to go. The doctor had called and told him to bring us back to the hospital right away.
When we returned, the doctor told me Caleb would have to be admitted, that he was very ill with malaria. They asked for a hundred dollar deposit towards his stay. Then they took us to what would be our room for the next six nights. For all of you medical people (Hi Geisinger Friends!) – the hospital was NOTHING like we are used to. I quickly scanned the room while the driver was still with me and asked about drinking water. “No, no drinking water here”, said the nurse. “How ‘bout toilet paper (I was thinking about ME, at this point, not Caleb)?” “No, no toilet paper here.” Hmmm…..ok……”How ‘bout meals?” “No, no meals. Your family will bring you these things.” “HELLO!!!!!!! MY Family???? I’m White! No family here in the Congo!” J So, no towels, no pillow, no soap, etc.
The driver went to St. Anne’s for me and I texted Vickie a list of things I’d need. Unfortunately, the only real food we had in our room was tuna, so we ate that for the first couple of meals (Yes, tuna for breakfast...yuk!). Fr. Theo came and brought me some mango and bread and Vickie did a great job of utilizing anyone that was coming in my direction to send food, water, etc. And, our dear friend from St. Anne’s, Leone, came and visited me on several occasions. She went to the store for us, went to the pharmacy (did I mention that they started the IV and handed me prescriptions to fill?!), and spent time visiting with me, which kept me from going CRAZY!! The people from St. Anne’s were such a blessing during the whole trip.
I remember being kinda scared because I didn’t know where I was, if it was safe, etc. Also, I’d never stayed in a hospital before where the PATIENT locked the door from the inside. It was all so strange. I remember texting George and my parents saying, “God is really stretching me too far….” I was so thankful for the memory verses learned. In the hospital, the verses that played in my mind were "My grace is sufficient for you..." and "Trust in the Lord with all your heart..." Great sources of comfort!
In hind sight, which is ALWAYS 20/20 :), it was great bonding for Caleb and me. He wanted nothing except his mama and I spent 24/7 loving on him (and reading ALL four books I had brought from home). There was NOTHING for me to do except focus on him.
The Congo hospital stay was an experience in itself. While the care seemed a bit barbaric and definitely antiquated by U.S. standards, the people were nice.
And, for all of you OR nurses, the nurses look SO nice coming to work even though they change when they get there.
They were all amused at the English-speaking White person. Those who were trying to learn English stopped by frequently during the days to chat. The student nurse pictured above is Evelyn. She LOVED to speak English as she had recently learned a little bit of our language. The patients that spoke English also knocked on my door and said they wanted to speak to me in my language. One mother knocked on my door at 5:00 in the morning. She had heard Caleb crying and wanted to tell me that maybe he was hungry or needed a diaper change. She told me that she had four children. Sweet of her to want to help, but I had already figured that one out! I shouldn't be so cocky, though, because the last morning, she also heard me getting sick to my stomach and came to see if I was ok and to offer to help with Caleb while I was ill. Sweet, sweet lady!
I had said several times during the adoption process that I wasn’t sure why God lead us to adopt from the Congo. I’m sure there are many reasons, but in the hospital, I got one answer. The doctors told me that if Caleb wasn’t being adopted, he would die. They said without money for proper medical care, etc, he would be a statistic of malaria. And, believe me, even with “proper” medical care, there were a couple of days where I wondered if he’d live to meet the rest of his family.
BUT, as I’ve said before, God took care of Caleb (and me)!
Here he's looking out the window thinking, "Ok, Driver, you can come get us now! I'm feelin' better!"
St. Anne's had begun to feel like home, so we were excited to get to leave the hospital for our room there.. Even though it was not home, it was a step closer. So, you may wonder what a six-night, seven-day hospital stay costs in the D.R. Congo since health insurance doesn't cover it? I mentioned the $100 deposit and when we were discharged, we owed another $265, for a total of $365 or a little over $60/day. No wonder they didn't provide a pillow or toilet paper! With the medicines that we had to buy over the course of the week, it costs around $600 - a small fraction of what it would have cost in the U.S.
Our room had been just through this door
That's all for tonight. I'm out of steam.....to be continued.
Our room had been just through this door
That's all for tonight. I'm out of steam.....to be continued.
Have a great night!
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